I'm trying. I'm not loving it and I'm not feeling very much, but I'm trying to open my heart and mind to new love and a new life. I'm not actively seeking, because for now (and maybe some time) I just want to be with me, creating a calm and tranquil life. But I am actively working to keep my heart and mind open, for fear that they'll both shrivel up permanently if I don't. And that would be such a terrible waste.