Wednesday, 6 April 2011

what could it be ...

that life is trying to tell me with this relentless pain? Why isn't it enough that I've lost you and all of my hope? Why is my life being dismantled piece by piece around me by some dark, mean, mysterious force that seems to hunger for my misery?

I simply do not have the strength to withstand what's happening. I sense, when I have a rare moment of clarity, that there's a symbiotic, almost parasitic relationship between loss and misery, where each feeds on the other until both have spiralled down into an abyss from which I'm almost certain I cannot return.

You were my anchor. Without you I'm adrift and at the mercy of the darkness.

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